Baring my scars

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I’ve suffered for over 20 years with scars, it’s been an uphill battle since I hit puberty. When I was 16 I went onto medication for my acne, this helped a lot, but the scars remained.

 
I tried every brand out there to either cover it up or try make it less or go away, nothing really helped, and no make-up can take away the texture of your skin.

 
I absolutely love make-up but not in the way most woman do, more so in a way that benefits the UGLINESS of my face, see make-up is my friend – it protected me from the harsh comments, the onlookers, societies demands to look a certain way.
I went through a phase where I never went a day without make-up, constantly trying to cover myself up, hiding my scars and myself from the world daily.

 
I envied anyone who walked about without foundation or a lick of lipstick or mascara. Those were the woman I wanted to be, self-assured, happy in my own skin and care free! I imagined a day like any other day, walking about in my own skin free of doubt and self-awareness and the constant struggle to look a certain way.

 
However, I got over this phase and gave my skin a breather and decided I need to face the world showing the true me, and so I go without make-up 98% of the time now. I can’t say it doesn’t bother me being so bare to the world, I fight some internal battles constantly regarding this. As a mom I want my own daughter to feel good in her own skin no matter what, she changed me, she changed my outlook and made me realise I need to be me, unperfect, bare and free.

 
ITS NOT easy, but I am on a journey, I started with laser therapy for my scaring and maybe it will even lead to micro-needling. I have options now that I never had before, I can see through the scars, my skin journey begins here, I’m hoping to not just be scar free but also a little care free too, I say a little because I’m a control freak (can we really be care-free?) LOL.

Yours in Mommyhood and Womanhood

xxxx

 

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