The MOM – series 2.0 : Meet Lindall

Next up on the Mom Series we have Lindall. I first met her at our instamama meet up last year and since then I have been obsessed with all things Lindall! She is beautiful, creative, fun and just my kind of person. I hope you love a glimpse into Lindall’s life as much as I did!

Give me a little introduction (a few sentences about yourself)

I’m a creative, mom, wife and DIY enthusiast. My Xhosa name Nwabisa means someone who is happy and makes others happy and it’s my life’s philosophy is to spread joy like confetti.

Describe your typical day in 5 words or less.

Blurry, busy, creative, crazy & loving

Name 3 things you can’t live without.

My family, my creativity & God

Attach a picture of your current mom bag and what’s inside.

Extra masks and sanitiser, my day to day bag, a change of clothes for Xavier and snacks

Name 1 thing you wish you knew before you became a mom.

I wish I knew how tough it really is. It’s a challenge that never lets you take a break, but it is also so rewarding in it’s chaotic beauty.

What do you do when the kids are asleep or napping?

I try to work on a creative project, or DIY. Sometimes I just end up falling asleep with my eyes open.

What’s the best part of your day?

Those “I love you mommy” moments. I’m a sucker for those.

Name a few of your mom Guilty pleasures.

Hiding in the toilet with my phone (don’t tell my husband)

Stealing Xavier’s headbands and playing ‘ Spa Day” on days when I just need a break and a face mask.

What has been the scariest moment of your mom life and who did you look to for support?

My scariest mom moments have been through my pregnancy. When I wasn’t sure if she would be ok. God got me through that one. Also bringing home a 1.9 kg baby who wouldn’t breast feed and just having no clue how to be a mom. How to get her weight up. Just handling this teeny tiny human was so scary. My hubby and my paed got me through that. My paid would call to check up on her and offer advice and my husband was a rockstar of support.

Name one thing (anything) that you would do if you weren’t afraid and were fearless and there were no consequences and nothing to hold you back.

I would stop limiting myself and just go big. I’m a huge over thinker and I spend far too much time over thinking everything than actually doing. I’m working on that though.

Name something that your mom taught you that you have taken into your own motherhood / parenthood.

My mom led by example. She did what needed to be done. She never limited what she could do. She would wake up and build a bookshelf. I got that from her, that I am capable of anything kind of attitude. I want to teach my daughter the same thing.

If you could be anyone for just one day who would you be?

My kid, she has the best life. Snacks on demand, full access to the remote (aka, if the tv is on, it’s playing something only she would watch), and the cutest outfits.

Worst mom-fail?

Not being able to give my kid my undivided attention 24/7. I know impossible right, but because I’m not working, whenever I do anything for myself. I feel incredibly guilty. I feel guilty for having my own interests & goals when I know right now, she’s incredibly lonely and bored as an only child. It may be irrational, but I feel like I fail her there.

In what way/How has motherhood changed you?

This may be a little shocking, but I never really wanted to have kids. It was never a goal of mine. I never thought of myself as maternal at all. Then one day 2 lines on a pregnancy test and a fight for my baby’s survival had me falling so in love with this kid. It brought out this fierce need to protect and love her and somehow changed so much of the woman I thought I was. 4 years down the line and I feel like being a mom and specifically being Xavier’s mom is like slipping into a pair of old comfy shoes, that fit just right. I’ve always been creative, but motherhood seemed to give my creativity a direction and purpose it didn’t have before. Motherhood has truly shaped me into the woman I was meant to be.

If your house was burning down, name 3 things you’d grab besides the kids and pets?

Hardrives/laptops with all the family photos
Xavier’s albums/keepsake box so she has a few of her baby treasures
My silhouette cameo

Send me a photo when you were at your worst or best during your motherhood journey and tell me why you chose it.

The day I was at my best but felt at my worst:

My doctor was really worried about Xavier’s growth and asked me to come in fro a c-section. I had wanted to have natural birth, but I trusted in my doctor after a tumultuous pregnancy. The first words my doctor said when she was born was ‘ We got her just in time’ . She had been slowing starving to death inside of me, because the umbilical cord was so thin. Xavier also has a very rare heart abnormality, She was in NICU and refused to breast feed or even take a bottle of my pumped milk. I felt on that day like my body failed her in so many ways. I felt like a terrible mother from the get go, but that was also the best day on my mothering journey. It was the day I became a mother. The day I realised that you can’t tick boxes to be a good mom. You have to do the best you can with the hand you’ve been dealt. Xavier was expected to stay in NICU for a long time, but when the nurses and doctors saw how well I took care of her, they realised her. I took her home on time and managed to get her weight up and keep her healthy. When I look at this picture it reminds me of that fierce motherly love and determination to give my kid the best chance. It’s me at my best.

Name one thing you would change about yourself and one thing you wouldn’t.

I procrastinate too much and overthink everything. That definitely needs to go!

I wouldn’t change my creativity. It keeps me sane.

What piece of advice would you give to a new mom starting her journey?

Just breath. You’ve got this. I know it seems tough. I know you feel overwhelmed, but you can do this. That little person loves you and you are a great mom. Also stack the freezer with frozen pastries. Take out a few rolls, croissants, etc every night, pop it in the oven in the morning and enjoy. You’ll feel like Martha Stewart without all the effort and your mother in law will be unbelievably impressed when you tell her you baked them from scratch

Who is your biggest support, attach a photo of you and him/her

My mom! Always in my corner. She’s always got my back and holds me accountable.

What is the best part of being a mom, only ONE thing please, I know it’s a hard one.

“I love you mommy. You’re the best mommy” Those words, the love behind them is everything.

Best book you’ve ever read.

I have a degree in literature! You can’t make me choose! My childhood favourite was ‘Pride and Prejudice’ and it’s still a favourite of mine.

Have you ever been judged for how you do things as a mom or how you parent? If so, why?

I think every mom has been judged in some way. There’s a million different ways to parent and what works for one family, may not work for the next. I’ve had my parenting choices questioned from the c-section, to the bottle over breast, to the use of a dummy. All of the above are choices we made for medical reasons, but they were still the most common questions people asked me.

Worst parenting advise you ever received?

You need to breastfeed, your kid can’t sleep in your bed, just throw the dummy away, there’s a lot more, but I think any piece of unsolicited advice given without knowing the history and circumstances surrounding these decisions is bad advice. I chose to only take advise I actively sort out through trusted channels, like family and close friends. Those pieces of advice were golden and although not every piece of advice worked for me, it might work for someone else. Each family is different.

Tell our readers something unique about yourself. (a hidden talent or maybe a secret project or something you are passionate about).

I love to travel. I’ve visited a few cities so much they became like second homes and I miss them terribly now. I would love to be able to travel again

Who/what inspires your creativity?

My daughter. So much of what I create is for her, because of her and inspired by her.

Tell us your most favourite DIY project to date and send us a photo of it.

Without a doubt the playhouse. It’s been my most ambitious project, but it’s also been such a triumph. It’s not completely done yet, I still want to do the interior and add a few things to the exterior but its a pretty structure that gets played in, so I’m happy. Blood, sweat and tears went into it and I hope Xavier sees the effort, the work and the time that we put into creating it for her. I hope she takes away not just a play space, but the knowledge that things don’t just appear, it takes hard work to create it. I hope she feels how special the space is, because we worked as a family to create it for her and if she doesn’t…you know I will remind her!